I'm Colby Granger
by Arikae
Summary: 12 hours after the end of Trust Metric. Colby just wants to come home.


**Author's note: This is a short episode tag to Trust Metric. I haven't written one in a while and this one popped into my head. I hope you all enjoy it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters.**

 **Warning: Not betaed.**

"Don Eppes." Don answered his cell phone in his usual manner at the office. His team had a heap of paper work to fill out after saving Colby Granger from the Chinese on a freighter headed for international waters. It was close. Too close. He still shuddered at the 'what ifs' of the past few days. Every decision they made since Colby escaped from prison could have lead to Colby's death. Every inaction, every hesitation could have killed Colby. Don knew he shouldn't be thinking about it but it wasn't just himself. He could see it in Megan and David's faces. They were all scared. They were all angry. They were all betrayed. They were all confused. Who was Colby Granger?

" _Agent Eppes. I'm calling from UCLA in regards to Mr Granger."_

David watched as the colour drained from Don's face. His own heart started beating faster when he heard Don's next words. "Is Colby okay?"

" _That's the problem, Sir. He's missing."_

Don's jaw hardened. "How long?"

" _Our cameras show he left the hospital about an hour ago."_

"Damn it!" Don hung up the phone without another word. He was too angry to say anything without regretting it later. He shot out of his chair and grabbed his gun and badge from his draw. "Let's go!" He called out to Megan and David. "Colby's missing." David and Megan exchanged looks of shock and fear before running after their boss.

* * *

Colby wrapped his arms tight around himself as he walked to the place that had been his home for the past two years. He wore a pair of jeans and brown t-shirt he _borrowed_ from a patient staying in the room next to his. They were a little loose but he wasn't trying to win any fashion competition.

He woke up in the hospital: cold…alone…in pain. His whole body felt like knives were stabbing through his skin. He knew why. In his sleep, he could hear broken words spoken by the doctor; drugs…days…system. He put the words together after he woke up. The drugs Lancer pumped him up with would take a few days to leave his system. Clearly, it hasn't been a few days. Hell, it felt like it hasn't even been a few hours. Colby knew the logical thing to do was to stay at the hospital and let the doctor do his job but he didn't want to stay in a room that made him feel cold and isolated. He wanted to go home. How long had it been since he'd seen his condo? Over six weeks? It felt like six years.

Two years undercover…two years of lying to his teammates…no! Colby stopped himself. _I didn't lie. Not about myself. I didn't lie._ Colby repeated that to himself. He started shaking as he walked. He wasn't cold. It was a nice day to anybody else. He was shaking because everything hurt, inside and out. He was shaking because he was scared. For two years he was on a mission. Now the mission was over and he'd never felt so unsure of what was going to come next. Kirkland was dead. He was never really a part of Don's team, as much as he wished he were. His father would tell him he was at crossroads in his life. He didn't know what was ahead for him and he had no one to turn to for advice.

* * *

Don sent Megan to the hospital to get information from the nurses and security cameras on where Colby could've gone. David sat in the passenger's seat and didn't say a word. Don looked over at his friend and agent. He couldn't read David since they saved Colby on the freighter. "You have any idea where Colby could be?" Don asked him.

David scoffed. "Why would I know? I don't know the guy."

Don sighed. He couldn't deny the truth of that statement. None of them knew the real Colby Granger. He'd been lying to them for two years. "Still, I need an idea on where to go. At the moment we're just praying for a stroke of luck."

"Do you have any ideas? You've known him as long as I have." Don could hear the cynicism in his voice and it irked him.

"If you're not going to help out then I'll stop the car and you can catch a ride back to the office." Don glared at him before turning his eyes back on the road. "If you don't give a damn about Colby then treat this like any other missing persons case that we've handled!"

David closed his eyes and let out a long breath, and temporarily with it, his anger. "Um…I don't know. Most missing persons are found in places that make them feel safe."

"And that would…" Don's cell interrupted his thoughts. It was his father. He answered on the hands-free. "Dad, we're in the middle of something here."

" _Yes, I know that Donnie. I'm calling to help."_ Alan told his son.

"Dad, how can you help? Colby's missing. I doubt you know him any better than any of us."

" _Well that may be true but I'm the only one who thinks of him as a hero. You are all still…um…what's the word…reeling… from everything he's done in the past. You all think he's a traitor."_

Don gave a sideway glance at David who was looking out the window as if he wasn't listening. "He lied to us, dad. He came onto our team to report on us."

" _See? You still don't trust him but I do. He made a sacrifice for his country and in my books, that's a hero. So you listen to me. Agent Reeves told Charlie what the doctor said. The drugs are still in his system."_ Don noticed David sit up a little at that bit of information. _"That means he's still in pain. He hasn't called any of you, which means he's feeling alone. He'd been locked up in jail for five weeks and running from the law."_

Don and David listened to Alan's words and put themselves in Colby's shoes. "He's heading home." They said together.

Alan hung up the phone, smiling. His son was a smart boy. He just needed a nudge once in a while.

* * *

Colby sat on the cold, wooden floor of his condo. He rested his back against the charcoal black couch and pulled his legs up to his chest. He'd been shaking violently since he arrived at the door of his home. FBI yellow and black tape cordoned off his condo. He had broken it and entered his home but it wasn't his home any longer. The shelves were empty, broken ceramic was on the floor where a small sculpture used to be. The walls had holes in them where the FBI punched with hammers to find any hidden, usable evidence against him. His couch was slashed for the same reason. There was nothing here that resembled his home. This was all wrong. It was worst than waking up in a hospital room. In the hospital, he was alone. Here…here, he was among the mess that was his previous life. It was a life he had hoped he could return to after completing his mission. It was a hope he held onto to get him through it all. Coming here told him any hope of returning to Don's team was gone. He sunk to the floor at the foot of his couch and did something he never thought he'd ever do.

He gave up.

* * *

Don and David found Colby like that and it broke down any anger they had. They looked around the condo in shock. Don remembered ordering agents to search Colby's place and to leave nothing un-turned but he never actually saw the damage of his order. "Man, Colby, I'm so sorry." He whispered. Colby's head shot up at his voice, making Don wince and apologise again. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

Colby frowned in confusion. These two men were the last people he expected to see here and why was Don apologising? "What…" He swallowed when his words got caught in his throat and tried again. "What are you…doing here?"

"Hospital called. Told us you were missing." Don was worried. Trembles wracked Colby's body. "They're really worried. It hasn't even been 12 hours since we found you on the freighter." That surprised Colby. He didn't know how he ended up at the hospital. He didn't know it was Don and the team that found him. Don nodded. "That's right. We caught up with you. You died on us. David saved your life." He gave Colby the short version of what happened.

Colby turned his eyes onto David who wouldn't look at him. It made him wonder if what Don was saying was true. Colby pulled his legs tighter against his chest and turned back to focusing on the pain. It kept him from thinking about his life. "Thanks." He said simply.

Don sighed. "Colby, we need to get you back to the hospital." He took a couple of steps closer to his friend.

"No, thank you."

"That wasn't really a request." Don said, tentatively, taking another step. "Doctor's worried. He said there's a high chance of you going into shock if we don't get you back soon."

"I'm fine."

"Stop being stubborn and let's go." The calm in David's voice didn't reflect how he was feeling. If he acted the way he felt he would be dragging Colby to the hospital right now. His…friend?...partner?...colleague?...whatever…Colby was in bad shape. He needed immediate medical attention.

Colby turned to them again. It was the first words he had heard from David since he interrogated him all those weeks ago. He saw the uncertainty in David's eyes, the doubt, the distrust. Colby didn't need to see any more. "No, thank you." He said again.

David was getting more and more concerned as the seconds ticked by and Colby grew paler but instead of showing his concern, he turned it into anger. "We didn't save your ass just to let you kill yourself!"

"David…" Don started to warn him but Colby's soft, quiet question stopped him.

"Why did you save me?"

Don was shocked at the question. It wasn't just the question; it was the tone of Colby's voice…like he truly didn't understand why they saved him. "Because we're…" Don thought back to the moment they decided to go after Colby. He thought about what Charlie said. His Trust Metric didn't tell them anything they didn't already know in their hearts. "Because even though we don't know who Colby Granger is, we knew, deep down, that we could trust you."

The answer should've given him some relief because Don just told him he trusted him but it only sounded that way. They didn't think they knew him. How can you trust someone you don't know? How could they not know him? They've taken everything that is him! "It's not hard to find out who Colby Granger is. Everything that was here…was me." Colby looked around. There was nothing left of him anymore. Tears came to his eyes. "I just wanted to come home." He whispered, shakily. "Why is that so hard?"

"You are home, Colby." Don told him, looking around. "We'll get everything back and clean this place up."

Colby looked up at him. Don winced at the emptiness in his eyes. "Sure." Colby bit his lip as he pushed himself off the cold floor. "I'm ready to go back now." He didn't know why he was being so stubborn in the first place. This place was worse than being in the hospital.

Don reached out as Colby walked unsteadily towards the door but Colby dodge any of their attempts at helping him. He didn't need their help. Colby only just made his way past Don and David when he lost footing and fell hard on the floor. "Aaahhh!" Colby yelled, curling in on himself. The pain threatened to send him into oblivion. He wished it would.

"Colby!" Don dropped to his knee, placing a hand on Colby's shoulder as he pulled out his cell. "Agent Eppes of the FBI. I need an ambulance at 10 North Ave, 34A."

David tore off his jacket and laid it over Colby. "Ambulance is on the way, Colby." Colby broke into a cold sweat as the pain got too much for him. "Talk to me, Colby." David frowned when Colby mumbled something incoherent. He leaned in closer. "What's that?" It was something repeated over and over again. David looked at Don when he sat back up.

"What?" Don asked. "What's he saying?" He wasn't sure he wanted to know the answer judging by the look on David's face.

David wanted to cry. They were such simple words but coming from Colby at this moment made the words heart wrenching. "I'm Colby Granger." Don's eyes shot down at the triple agent. Nobody knew how much it meant to Colby for everyone to know that he's still the same Colby Granger they met two years ago.

"I'm Colby Granger. I'm Colby Granger. I'm Colby Granger…"

Don squeezed Colby's shoulder. "You're Colby Granger." He told him firmly. He shook his head, worried. "He's going to go into shock if he keeps this up." Don told David, referring to the violent shaking he could feel under his hand. "We have to do something."

David took a deep breath and let it out. He rested his hand on the side of Colby's head. He knew what Colby needed to hear. "Your father's your role model. He'd take you fishing and hunting on the weekends. Everything you know about camping you learned from him. He died when you were 15. You were a wrestler in high school. You like playing golf. You like the outdoors and you love surfing. After your college degree, you received three years of interrogation techniques. You joined the army under the Criminal Investigation Division. Two British soldiers died when you and your team set a trap for the insurgents. It wasn't your fault but you still feel guilty about what happened. You went to Quantico after your tour and joined us after you completed your training. We solved cases together. We watched each others backs for two years." Don watched in awe as David spoke. He watched as his agent wiped at his wet eyes. He felt Colby's trembles start to calm. "You love Chinese food. You hate driving in traffic, which is why we take turns driving. You get uncomfortable around women that are too forward." Don chuckled at that. It was true and Colby tended to attract those types of women. "You're a really good guy." David continued sombrely. "You have a cool head." It was something Don admired about Colby. He was calm in every situation; never letting his emotions get in the way of his job. It's what made him a good soldier and an even better FBI Agent. "You're FBI. You're my friend. You're my partner." David smiled when Colby's trembling stopped. His body was no longer tense from fighting the pain. "You're Colby Granger."

Don smiled proudly at David when it seemed like Colby was relaxing. "Good job."

David scoffed, not thinking he did a good job at all. "It was all he wanted. He came here because he needed something to tell him he was still the man his father wanted him to be. He wanted to remind himself of the Colby Granger we met two years ago." He shook his head at himself. "He wanted us to remember him, but we tore this place apart. We took everything away from him."

Don sighed. David's anger at Colby was redirected at himself. "His stuff is at Quantico. I'll make sure it gets express couriered back here by tomorrow."

"Damage is already done." David said dejectedly.

"Well then I'll fix it." Don said confidently because knew exactly what Colby needed.

The paramedics arrived to take Colby back to the hospital. He started regaining consciousness as they pushed him into the ambulance. The paramedic tried to get him to answer a few simple questions but Colby wasn't aware of what was happening. It felt like his nervous system was trying to kill him. "Sir, can you tell me your name?" Name? Yes, Colby definitely knew his own name. He opened his mouth to answer but nothing came out but a groan. "It's okay, sir. You'll be at the hospital soon and the doctor's there will fix you up." The paramedic looked at David who still hadn't taken his eyes off Colby. "His stats aren't great but nothing life threatening. He'll be okay." David wanted to laugh. The paramedic didn't know what he was talking about.

* * *

 **Two days later…**

As soon as Colby arrived at the hospital his doctor gave him a sedative and kept him sedated for two days to ensure his system was cleared of the drugs Lancer gave him and to prevent any more attempts at escape.

Colby looked around the room groggily. Everything was blurry, like a fog in the room. He blinked his eyes over and over until his vision finally cleared. He sighed when he saw he was in the hospital. He never liked hospitals. "That's another thing I know about you." Colby jumped at the voice. He turned to his left and found his former partner sitting in a chair next to the bed. He frowned, confused as to why he was here and what he was talking about. "You don't like hospitals. You never did since your dad died."

Colby was still confused. "What are you doing here, David?"

"Doctor said he'd be waking you up today." It still didn't answer his question or help clear up the confusion. "I'm here because it's what partners do." David told him straight out.

Colby sighed and turned away. "I'm not your partner."

David smiled. He pulled out an envelope from inside his jacket. Colby frowned at it. "It's your new assignment within the FBI. Don signed off on it. He wanted to be here to give it to you in person but he got pulled into a Bureaucrat meeting." Colby wasn't sure he wanted to know what was in the envelope. The envelope decided his future. Tentatively, he reached out for it but just as his fingers touched the envelope, David pulled it away. He glared at the man. David quickly put his hands out to stave off the anger Colby was about to unleash. "I just want to ask you a question before you open this."

"What?" Colby asked, not liking the game David was playing.

"What do you want this envelope to say?"

Colby clenched his fist. He vaguely remembered what happened at his condo. David knew what he wanted so why was he asking? Did he want to be here when he woke up just to be cruel? _I want to stay on the team. I don't want to go anywhere._ "Does it matter what I want? Do I get a choice?"

"Of course you do." David held up the envelope again. "You don't have to accept this. You can ask for another assignment."

"Just give me the damn envelope!" Colby pushed himself up, trying to grab it.

"Why won't you tell me what you want?" David stepped back.

Colby glared daggers at the man. "Because it'll never happen!" He said through clenched teeth. "So why should I bother asking?"

"Because the Colby Granger I know would never be scared to ask and he never runs away from his problems." David told him confidently.

"What are you trying to say, David?" Colby dropped back into the bed, too tired to fight with his former partner any longer.

"I'm trying to tell you that you're still you, no matter what others think." David had two days to think about what Colby was doing at the apartment. He didn't just want everyone else to know who he was. He wanted to convince himself that he was still the same person he was before he went undercover for Counter-Intelligence. "You know who you are, Colby."

Colby suddenly felt so vulnerable. He was an open person but he didn't like letting others read him so easily. "I don't know what I want anymore." Colby admitted.

It saddened David to see Colby so unsure of his self. He'd completed his undercover assignment with the knowledge that he would be coming out of it with the job of an FBI field agent. It was unnerving to see Colby this way. "You do know what you want, Colby. There's a reason why you went to your condo after waking up."

Colby scoffed at that. "Don't talk to me about the condo. It's not my condo anymore." The image of the mess came to mind but Colby shoved it away. He hated the empty feeling it gave him. He looked at David and then down at his IV. He felt trapped. "I need to go."

David's eyes widened in horror as Colby yanked out his IV. "What are…" He grabbed Colby as he tried to get out of the bed. "Where do you think you're going?!"

"Away from you!" Colby fought the hands that were keeping him in the bed but David had the advantage. Colby was still weak from his ordeal. "Let me go!"

David used all his strength to stop Colby's struggling. "You want me to leave? Read what's in the envelope."

Colby glared at the envelope that was still in David's hand. "Fine!" David nodded in relief and got off Colby. He held the envelope out to his friend. Colby slowly took it in his hands. As he opened the envelope, his heart started pounding. _Where am I going?_ He pulled out the letter and read it silently. He squinted at the words, unsure of what he was reading. This was a mistake. "I'm staying?" He looked up at David for a confirmation.

"You're staying." David smiled.

Colby didn't dare to believe it. He stared at the paper as if the words on it were going to change. This was what he wanted; to stay on the team so why wasn't he happy? Why wasn't he relieved that it was all finally over? "Why?"

David sighed. Colby went from being confident in his abilities to doubting himself because of how they've handled the situation. David believed his reaction to Colby's supposed betrayal was warranted but he should've done more as soon as they found out Colby was a triple agent. At the very least, he should've been there when Colby woke up in the hospital. "Because it's what we want. The team hasn't been the same without you." He smiled at the hope in Colby's eyes. He knew they were the right words. If he had told Colby it was because it was what he wanted, Colby would've thought they pitied him. Colby needed to know it was a team decision. "In the two years we've been partners, we did a lot of good. Imagine what we can do now when you have nothing else but our cases on your mind?"

Colby gave a short, tired laugh. "I'll give you and Don a run for your money."

David chuckled at that. "After what you did, you could be our boss one day."

"Nah," Colby shook his head. "I just want to be a field agent. If I can do that for the rest of my career, I'll be satisfied." His eyes started drifting closed. The sedative was still in his system. "I'm sorry I couldn't tell you." He mumbled in his half-sleep state.

David nodded sadly, "I know. You couldn't tell anyone, but you never lied to me about yourself. I know who you are, Colby Granger." He waited until Colby was sleeping comfortably before heading back to the office.

 **FBI Headquarters…**

Don looked up when David arrived back. He'd been waiting impatiently to hear how Colby responded to his request for him to stay on the team. "How is he?" Don asked as soon as David reached his desk.

David looked around the office. "Where's Megan?"

"Boss wanted to talk to her about something." Don answered quickly so he could get his question answered. "So how's Colby?"

"Tired, but the doctor said he'll be discharged tomorrow." David told him.

Don waited for David to say more but he didn't, deliberately annoying him. "And what did he say about my request!?"

David chuckled, "He couldn't believe it at first so it took a little convincing, but he's coming back."

"Yes!" Don pumped his fist, grinning. "Didn't I tell you I knew what he wanted?"

"Yeah, yeah, you're real smart."

Don leaned back in his chair, looking and feeling more relaxed than he's been in weeks. "Are you taking him back to your place or my place tomorrow?"

David let out a long breath. "It'll be most ideal if we can take him back to his condo."

Don still felt guilty about that. "Those guys did a thorough job with his place."

"We should've known. The whole entire department felt betrayed. They were just taking the chance to vent." David couldn't imagine how it would feel to go home to find his place completely trashed. Especially in Colby's state of mind. David looked at Don suspiciously. He knew the look Don wore. It meant he had a plan.

"You know, if we feel guilty about Colby's place how do you think they would feel?"

"What are you thinking?" David asked, cautiously only to get a cheeky grin from Don.

 **The next day…**

David picked up Colby from the hospital, much to Colby's relief. Nobody hated hospitals more than he did. He closed his eyes in the car, enjoying the comfortable silence between he and his partner. It felt so good to be back to this level of comfort with David. It has been too long.

Colby sat up when he realised where David was driving. Any other time he would be happy to go back to his place. Any other time he would be begging David or Don to take him back to his place, but this was different. He didn't need to see his condo again. "You know, if it's too much trouble for me to stay with you or Don, I can stay at a motel."

David looked over at him. "Why would you want to do that?"

Colby was confused now. He knew David would never be so cruel and yet here he was driving him to a home that was no longer a home. "I don't want to go home, David." Colby said plainly.

David heard the slight shiver in Colby's voice and looked over again. "Trust me."Colby sighed and nodded, though his heart was beating a million miles an hour now. David knew Colby would like what they've done but it was still painful to see how nervous Colby was at returning home. Seeing his home destroyed really shook him up. "You do trust me, right?"

"Of course." David smiled at the quick, doubtless answer.

* * *

Colby couldn't believe what he was seeing. His apartment was restored to exactly the way it was before he was revealed as a spy. All his belongings were back. Even the furniture and broken sculpture was back. "How?"

Don grinned, looking very proud of himself. "We're FBI. We can find serial killers. How hard can it be to replace everything here?"

Colby sat down on his new/old couch, still in awe of it all. The walls were perfectly plastered. "You used FBI resources to get it all back?"

"We had help as well. The team sent here to toss your place felt bad. They fixed the walls and drove to Vegas the pick up the exact replica of your statue." David laughed at the extent guilt could drive someone, especially when it was used as a tool by Don.

Colby drew in a sharp breath at that. "That was just something I got for five bucks at a bargain store."

Don shrugged, "Well now it's $89.99 from Vegas."

Colby grinned, "It's priceless." He looked around the room. "It's all priceless." He let out a long, contented breath. "I would've been happy with just having my belongings back."

"You should've had a home to come back to. We took that away so it's only right that we give it back." Don flopped down next to him. "It's good to have you back."

Colby turned to him. "Thanks."

"I also restocked your fridge." Don revealed. "David, grab us a beer. We should be celebrating."

Nothing could've wiped the grin off Colby's face that day. This was the perfect homecoming.

 **The End.**


End file.
